Please tell me this is an April's Fools joke.

Evidently, the reason why the country's been in the shitter is because all the weak, emotional, easily manipulated women are voting with their vaginas instead of their brains.  Those laws requiring kids to wear helmets aren't for safety, they're just because those strange creatures with boobs cry too much over children dying!  Also, evidently, female voters caused WWII.  That's right, people, that 'Hitler' fella was just a scam concocted by the pansy President the women put in the White House.

Seriously, this article is so fucking ridiculous that I can't even be pissed off, just amused.  The guy holds up Ronald Reagan as the epitome of reason, for fuck's sake. (Which, uh, doesn't really make sense, because weren't the 80's directly after the feminist movement?  So didn't women have MORE power when Reagan was voted in?)

Now, the comments?  THOSE are goddamn terrifying.  Although I personally doubt that half the people claiming to be women agreeing with the article are actually so.

So.

If I were to write a vampire!Merlin fic, should I go with the traditional "Merlin gets bitten by a vampire/Arthur copes" story? Or should I go full-out AU with this shit and Twilight it up into a modern-day vampire romance?  Hmmm . . . .

Okay.  Now that reveals are in (yay!), I can disclose which fic I wrote!

this is not a chick flick
Hades/Persephone, 8092 words

I can also now confess that I have spent the last week with my jaw gradually finding itself closer and closer to the ground, because holy effing shit.  The reaction this story got was absolutely unbelievable.  Literally, as I am still unable to believe it and often wonder if these people are trying to comment for other stories and accidentally sent them to mine.

To everyone who commented, THANK YOU SO MUCH.  Not only was this the first time I ever signed up for Yuletide, it was also my first foray into Livejournal (although I have lurked for quite some time) and my first time posting a fic online (that Naruro fic I wrote in eighth grade does not count and will never be spoken of again).  Honestly, I could not asked for a better experience.

If you are here from Yuletide looking for other fic (and given that I have done absolutely nothing else worthwhile, most of you probably are), tragically there is nothing here yet!  However, I will definitely be writing and posting both original works and fanfic, so it would be absolutely lovely if you stayed around. 

Again, thanks so much for the kind words!  As cliche as it sounds, I am beyond honored and thrilled.

Dear awesome Yuletide writer,

Hullo!  I am not a crazy person, I swear.  Honestly, I am not that picky - anything you write will undoubtedly make me very happy!  However, if you would like to get to know my tastes better, here are my (hopefully coherent) ramblings:

Things in general:

I prefer stories where the characters gradually fall in love over already established relationships.  Humor makes me squee in glee; I love banter, wit, satire, sarcasm (SO MUCH), and really, the snarkier the better.  Close friendships also make me melt.  Smut is awesome, but unnecessary.  I am a realist, but not a cynic; in other words, while I mentally gag at the idea of 'one true love' or 'love at first sight', I do enjoy a happy ending.  I also prefer slash to het (except in the care of How I Met Your Mother, where Barney with ANYBODY fills me with glee).

Please, no scene-stealing OCs,  non-con or deathfic!  Those three, plus sappy non-canon nicknames, are really my only squicks.

Onto the specific fandoms!

Flame of Recca - Joker/Raiha

Slash, please! So I have a special fondness for Joker and Raiha - they're pretty much my favorite characters in the world, and I'd love to see what's behind those enigmatic smiles. What you do with them is entirely up to you, but if you want a prompt, a story set post-series with Raiha on his own without Kurei and Joker coming back from wherever (I refuse to believe he's dead) would be awesome! Or maybe the two are sent out on an assignment? Feel free to add in any other characters; I am a whore for well-written Flame of Recca fic. At any rate, a big YES to witty banter and characters gradually falling for each other, and a big NO to angsty endings or deathfic - canon already broke my heart once!

If you got matched up on this request, that makes me SO HAPPY I CAN'T EVEN.  Um.  Assassin + Assassin = AWESOME -SQUARED.  Seriously, you can pretty much write me ANYTHING and I won't care.  I would love some exploration into their backstories, and you can honestly make up whatever you want in regards to that.  Um, my favorite thing about these two characters, other than the spectacular amount of snarky humor they bring, is that they are actually very dangerous underneath all their clumsy flailings and acts of stupidity, so a scene in which they show off some of that kickass skillz would be fabulous.  But seriously, write whatever the hell you want and I will be squealing with excitement regardless.

How I Met Your Mother - Barney Stinson

Barney is simultaneously the most selfish and selfless character on the show; he's a jackass who likes to jerk people around for his own entertainment, but he also goes to extraordinarily extravagant lengths to help out his friends without a second thought (like flying to San Francisco, running into traffic, etc.). So, I would like a fic exploring why the other four characters are friends with Barney and what weird hijinx they've gotten up to thanks to him. Gen, het, or slash is all fine by me!

This request, for me, is less about romance (although feel free to pair up whoever you want) and more about friendship.  Barney is just such an exaggerated character that the gang must have gotten into to more adventures than the ones shown in episodes because of him.  I would love a story chronicling Barney's individual interactions with the other four and how he affected their lives.  Go wild with wherever your imagination takes you; there is no idea too big for the Barnicle to tackle! 


Fairy Tales (trad) - Beauty and the Beast/Cinderella/Sleeping Beauty aka Briar Rose/Snow White

There is almost nothing I adore more than a fantastic satire of a well-known fairytale. I also have a HUGE thing for smartasses. So, I would love to read something starring a snarky jester (jesters are so overlooked in fairytales that it makes me sad). Also, Prince Charming is one of the most generic characters of all time, so a deeper exploration of the poor guy would be awesome! Slash preferred, but gen or het is fine as well. I requested the four fairytales above because they take place in a court setting, but feel free to choose another fairytale if you want - I won't tell! Also, while I'm not all too fond of sap or fluff, I am a romantic at heart; you don't have to write 'happily ever after', persay, but the only tears I want to be shedding are tears of laughter.

Think Pratchett - or, if you haven't read Pratchett (which you should), satire in general is plain awesome.  I love fairytales because all of their bland bluebirds-in-forests and happily-ever-afters can't hide the undercurrent of darkness that's running through them.  Um, so, basically, I would love it if you'd apply reality and depth to the standard fairytale.  What happens to the country if the prince marries a commoner?  And if Prince Charming is so charming, why does he show absolutely no interest in girls at first, only to fall in love with the woman in the prettiest dress?  Are the faerie-folk really as innocent as they seem?  (Um, you don't have to actually answer these questions, but you get the point.)  Snark as much as you want!  (And I really would love a story starring a jester - what does the only person in court who can get away with mocking royalty do with his power?  Someone who is never taken seriously - what does he see?)

Ludwig Kakumei - Ludwig/Wilhelm

Gen or slash is fine here! Prince Ludwig is such a magnificent bastard that I just want to see him deconstruct and destroy more fairytales (with Wilhelm by his side, of course). Pick any fairy tale that wasn't covered in the series that you want - Beauty and the Beast, Little Mermaid, or the Snow Queen, just to name a few! I love the comic/gothic horror mix of the series, so anything in that vein would be wonderful!

Pretty much, see above regarding fairytales.  Ludwig Kakumei is pretty much everything I love about fairytales in art form.  If you've read the series, again, just anything in that vein would be fantastic!  

Please, don't feel like you have to restrain yourself to what you think I would like!  As long as you enjoy writing the story, I'm sure I'll enjoy reading it!  Thanks so much!

-- bookesque